Japan 2005. Dir Takeshi Kitano. With 'Beat' Takeshi, Akihiro Miwa, Ren Osugi. 112 mins. In Japanese with English subtitles.
A triumph of autonomy over consequence, what begins as a sharp comedy blurring the lines between reality and fiction quickly devolves into a banal mess that an art student might be ashamed of (sorry Beat!)…

There are moments in the eponymously titled Takeshis’ when Mr. Kitano almost achieves that clever crossing of the line between fact and fiction, dreams and reality, so gloriously explored by Spike Jonze and Charlie Kaufman in their collaborations Adaptation and Being John Malkovich. Then it all goes wrong…

Successful TV star Takeshi Kitano meets his doppelganger, a failed wannabe actor who hopes ones day to be him. Instead, we follow his days attending auditions and working in a SevenEleven, mocked by his friend. That is, of course, as close to a narrative as I can give you. I could try and explain it more, but it’s just not worth the effort!

Every time you think Kitano might do something witty or clever with the premise, he turns a corner and becomes triter, with such juvenile humour that a 12 year-old might be embarrassed by it. What starts out neatly satirising his work, stupidly exaggerated gunfights and dance, soon becomes over-powered by his obsessions. The later half being little more than one shooting after another, followed by boringly photographed dance after tap dance after break dance routine. Trust me, by this point you won’t believe the film is under two hours long!

Such playing with reality and fiction is becoming more and more commonplace nowadays, lines get particularly blurred in films like A Cock and Bull Story and American Splendor. It’s just Kitano makes such a hash job of it all. It’s not so much a case of losing his way, more he just doesn’t care. He’s reached that same level of autonomy that Takashi Miike enjoys. However, even Miike’s most difficult films have something of value in them.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m usually a big fan of Kitano - I loved Zatoichi. If you are too you should take care to avoid this pretentious twaddle!

1 star